Introduction
I’m Brendan Pickering, and like most people you know I like to think that I live a unique and exciting life. Is that actually the case? Well, I’m not really sure, since this is the only life I have. What I do know is that excitement and uniqueness is relative, and thus you must decide whether or not my life and ideas deserve your consideration.
We’ll start with an example I like to call, my “phast phood philosophy:”
Why do people eat at Applebee’s, Outback steakhouse or Denny’s? Restaurants like these truly boggle my mind. Here’s why:
To me, there is little to no difference in the quality of meat between a Denny’s or Applebee’s hamburger (Milestones etc. for you Canadians) and one from Burger King.
Quality: I would go so far as to say that the quality may be better at BK simply because there is a smaller margin of error thanks to lack of a chef. It’s possible that a chef at a Denny’s might make a pretty good burger, but I have a feeling 9 times out of 10 you could do it better yourself, and also have peace of mind knowing that you washed your hands. Go ahead, spin that wheel of fortune and get back to me.
Taste is quality (q) multiplied by preparation (p). I prefer the taste of a whopper to a “gourmet” denny’s burger, all day every day. It consistently tastes the same, and I can count on it being ready in a few minutes. If it tastes better at BK, why not just go there every time? The price?
Price: At BK I can get a meal for 6 or 7 bucks depending on medium or large, sometimes even lower if it’s one of those special meal days. At a mid-scale restaurant it’ll run you 2 bucks for a drink (unless you go with water) a minimum of 5.99-7.99 for your meal, and then there’s the tip. At a normal 15% you are looking at (without a drink) 7 – 9 dollars for your meal. The burger itself is guaranteed to be more expensive as a stand-alone item too. But, let’s not forget the service.
Service: Is someone really going to argue that the service at Denny’s is better than the service at BK? I don’t think so. Burger King doesn’t make me tip, and my food arrives a lot quicker. I’ve also already established that I prefer the taste. I am also unaffected by other patrons concerns. I am always served in turn, with all attention focused on getting me exactly what I want. There is no ambiguity, and I know for a fact that the workers at BK can actually make everything on their menu, since, well, they don’t have to make it. Plus, in my experience it’s pretty difficult to forget about someone sitting at your drive-thru window.
Lastly, it’s about TIME. I don’t need to waste my time at a sub-par restaurant masquerading as anything remotely near to fine dining when I can get something I prefer for less money. It is this that is the icing on my cake of culinary dissatisfaction.
Remember this the next time someone proposes going out to dinner at a place that “everyone can agree on.”
Popularity: 1% [?]